affirming flames
I've decided to try a new feature. I'm not sure of the interval yet, but let's try this out.
Tell me something good.
Tell me good news--a news story I might not have seen, something that makes you smile or makes you feel better about the world. Tell me a story that has in it something of the joy of human potential. Tell me about something going right. Tell me about something that made your day, your week, your year. Tell me about your wellspring of strength, your recent good fortune, your confirmation that Somebody Up There Cares. Tell me why you feel good about bringing children into a world so full of danger and hurt and trouble. Tell me why you get back up, how you get back up, what you do when there's too many punches to roll with.
Tell about a time it went okay. Tell me about hope. Tell me about triumph. Tell me about lighting a candle, or about someone who lit yours, in a dark place.
Tell me about miracles.
Tell me something that makes this life, this world, in all this suffering, a little more okay.
Light me a lantern.
Tell me something good.
Tell me good news--a news story I might not have seen, something that makes you smile or makes you feel better about the world. Tell me a story that has in it something of the joy of human potential. Tell me about something going right. Tell me about something that made your day, your week, your year. Tell me about your wellspring of strength, your recent good fortune, your confirmation that Somebody Up There Cares. Tell me why you feel good about bringing children into a world so full of danger and hurt and trouble. Tell me why you get back up, how you get back up, what you do when there's too many punches to roll with.
Tell about a time it went okay. Tell me about hope. Tell me about triumph. Tell me about lighting a candle, or about someone who lit yours, in a dark place.
Tell me about miracles.
Tell me something that makes this life, this world, in all this suffering, a little more okay.
Light me a lantern.
Labels: affirming flame, metablogging
posted by little light | 4:20 AM
19 Comments:
by the wonders of the internet - indeed, by the wonders of teh stoopid myspace - i have found an old college friend with whom i have not spoken in about 20 years, and we are going to have a phone chat over the weekend and catch up. i have some bad news as well as good news to share with her - a mutual friend passed away in the interim and she doesn't know yet - but other than that it's wonderful to be reconnected to someone believed to be lost. this has actually happened to me several times in the last few months. as cornball and silly as they may seem, do not underestimate the (potential) value of social networking web sites - especially if you are a lonely old codger like me desiring to reconnect with old friends.
here's a happy story:
once upon a time this girl had this blog and it was brilliant and inspired people and told the truth.
here's the link:
http://takingsteps.blogspot.com/
:)
Walking around Portland this time of year I feel forced to remember how damn abundant the world is... I walked from drinking cider at Beulahland on 28th and Burnside back to the pink house and ate apples, blackberries, and the best sweet-tart plum I've ever had. The sun woke me up this morning again and I strolled down the street to pick a cup full of warm blackberries to eat with yogurt. There's St. John's wort growing in the ugly strip between the sidewalk and the street -- "good for the sads," my friend says -- and it is good because every time I see it I remember her saying that to me. Before long, after all this abundance, the trees will start to lose their leaves. Bare trees are my favorite. I love how clear the pattern of the branches becomes with all the foliage gone.
The person I was drinking that cider with in Beulahland is someone whose heart I broke; someone who called me on rainy nights and said "I'm not sure if it's ok to call but you're the only person I can think of to talk to," crying even though she never cries. I talked to her because I didn't know what else to do, but now I talk to her because I trust her. She listens to me and I listen to her, and she calls me on all my bullshit and makes me laugh to boot.
I haven't the foggiest idea what I'm doing after October 2 -- no plans, commitments, barely even a notion -- but mostly when I tell this to the older and wiser they laugh and say "what else are you supposed to be doing? you're young." Most notably Satya who came into my house today to cook Food Not Bombs with a huge bike trailer full of watermelons, basil, tomatoes, peaches, pears, fruit bread and muffins and told me about how he hasn't really used money since 1991, and his friend who doesn't even touch the stuff. Also Lonnie who I met on a train from San Francisco. She said "honey, you don't seem old enough to be alone on this train" and I said "no way, I'm twenty!" and she said "no way! honey, are you in college?" and sat down and told me -- hands and long silver earrings flashing -- about racing Harleys and taking in kids who need second chances and mentoring girls to stand up to their abusers.
I feel silly writing all this.... but my life feels blessed all over right now, and everything is like a miracle.
At the age of 38, I have just watched All About Eve for the first time. A small good thing.
This post at Shakesville, a story about the Anti Racist Action's clown block disrupting a KKK rally, totally made my week:
http://shakespearessister.blogspot.com/2007/08/white-flour.html
my second marriage convinced me that if at first you don't succeed, try, try again. my husband brings me joy i have never experienced, an unconditional love i have never known, and a connection with another soul that has redefined my understanding of the word "relationship".
Went to my Dad's this weekend and he had a tent already set up for me, built me a fire, lit a lantern and I had a fantastic time. A couple of years ago I didn't like to go there alone because I just didn't know how to talk to him. Now, I love going there and we talk freely. I am so thankful for my family of oddballs.
I am happy. For the first time in a year, I am happy. I feel joy and hope. After months of sleeping and crying and hiding, I can enjoy life again.
Happiness fucking rocks.
And if depression hits me again I know to get help, I know I can get through it, and I know I have friends who'll support me all the way
Last week, my young sons and their dad passed a fellow struggling with some yard equipment while they were walking to the playground. The fellow let out a loud and exasperated "f*ck it" and one of the boys stopped, pondered the unhappy fellow for a few seconds and shouted out to him "peace, dude."
We didn't teach this to the guys (I think they picked it up from the hippie neighbors, bless them) but sure are proud of them for it.
A news story you might not have seen, that I liked very much - a lifeguard at a beach in New York saved a 2 foot sand shark from some swimmers who had surrounded it, and were, uh, not being very nice. The lifeguard rescued the little shark and swum him further out to sea to let him go safely. And even though the little shark understandably wanted to bite the lifeguard whilst being saved, the lifeguard still had nothing but kind words for the shark.
"All About Eve" is still a good thing on the tenth or twentieth viewing ime...
After I got out of a emotionally abusive relationship, I went to a not-very-close friend to talk because I felt like no one else wanted to hear it. He listened, and hugged me and let me cry when I needed to cry; let me rage when I needed to rage; and when I was tired and sick of both he played videogames with me so I could smile. For two months, without complaint. And things got better, slowly. And slowly I got out of the selfishness of being hurt and realized he loved me. I loved him back.
it is magical that i stumbled upon this post tonight!
i have been so stressed out with different organizing-related things, trying to balance all of that with creative pursuits, my personal life, as well as trying to make enough money to live off of when there are no jobs.
earlier today i got an email from a friend about the friendship between june jordan and carol haddad, and it instantly calmed me because i was happy thinking about this legacy of feminists of color collaborating with each other.
the best way for me to deal with stress is to have quiet alone time. typically this time is spent on the balcony in the evening. i am staying at my mom's house, in my hometown, which out in the sticks. it is really nice to get away from the city for a minute. i just got back home from sitting on a picnic bench watching the lake and listening to canadian geese honking, fish jumping, and bugs making clicking noises. sooo peaceful.
Today, in a little bit, I'm going to head about a hundred blocks east for my weekly date with my Little Sister. For all that I asked to be matched with an older kid, I am amazed and really happy that I wound up with her. She doesn't remember my name, most of the time -- she's eight, has seen me once a week for only the past month or two -- so she calls me "mentor", which I find incredibly precious. In spending time with her, I'm discovering things I would otherwise not have found, like how gorgeous the trail around the lake is, and that there are reservoirs up on the hill with the park, and that I really can hike for two hours, climb stairs, and still manage to push the merry-go-round faster than any of the kids can. I come out of my time with her (exhausted, to be truthful) so happy and peaceful. Traffic doesn't get me riled up on my drive home. Maybe this is grace?
I've got a job. A solid, unionised, double-time on sundays job. The staff here look out for each other, before customers, before their career advancement, and management mostly keep to themselves. I'm gonna transition here, (from female to something else) and i think it might, just might,work out all right.
Little Thing:
Movies like "Stardust" (yes, I know there was a book first, I can't wait to read it).
Big Thing:
I have this best friend who I can call whenever and for whatever important or stupid reason and talk about anything and everything - I can sound as disjointed and crazed and sad and bitchy as I need to, just to get it out there, and she always gives me the perspective I need to get through, to keep getting by.
And she lets me do the same for her. It makes me feel like a real, decent human being to have that solid supportive interaction, when a lot of my life right now is bordering on being disapointing.
Another Little Thing:
She leaves me fabulous messages on my voicemail, and they make me laugh out loud, pretty much every time.
I love you, too, Anonymous.
This story made me happy-
http://viv.id.au/blog/?p=928
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